And the path to nowhere, perhaps.

“Deep Thoughts” by Aunt Bubba

Do you remember that skit from SNL with Stuart Smalley? This is kind of like that, only deeper.

Recently, a friend of mine had to say goodbye to someone she loved. Someone who loved her back. Someone who could have been her greatest love…until he wasn’t.

It was a relationship that never was meant to be, but despite the hope she had, she knew the truth. She made the difficult yet courageous decision to end things first, before their feelings developed into something more.

She shared a draft of the letter to him with me. As much as she wanted to have the conversation in person, she knew she wouldn’t be strong enough to follow through with it, especially since it would be a week before she would see him in person again.

I read the letter. It was heartbreaking and empowering at the same time. He was notorious for not making her a priority, and she had had enough.

“It’s been 4 days and he hasn’t responded,” she said.

“You know what Mel Robbins would say…‘No response is a response,’” I said.

She bowed her head and nodded as if she knew what it meant.

I followed up with more comforting words:

“That silence hurts, sis, I know. After everything—your honesty, your love, your courage to walk away—you deserved at least a some sort of response other than his silence.”

“He’s really good at compartmentalization, so maybe he’s taking time to think about how to respond,” she said.

“Perhaps, or it says he’s not willing to meet you in the depth of your truth. (Deep Thoughts by Aunt Bubba mode)

Maybe it means he can’t—or won’t—offer closure, because that would require facing what he lost.

Sis, you did THE bravest thing. You stood up for YOU worth. You walked out of the shadows and into the light of truth. You chose to heal, even if it meant letting go of someone you were in love with.

You’ve been praying for God to bring you a Godly man, so maybe this is God’s way of making sure this particular door stays closed, so you don’t keep knocking on something that was never meant to be a home.”

“Yeah. You’re probably right,” she said. “Thank you for being my friend. I always feel better after talking to you.”

Hang in there, single ladies. Your Prince Charming will be here soon.

Love. Give. Love.